These are 10 simple yet effective steps to make first conversations go smoothly and give a great impression.
Make eye contact.
Avoiding eye contact upon meeting can heavily imply nervousness on the part of the individual. But even worse, it can come across as disinterest, giving the appearance of arrogance even when unintended.
Smile.
Don’t overdo it, but a pleasant smile shows confidence and personability. A frown or overly stern expression will only give the impression that you are an unpleasant individual.
Shake hands properly.
A proper shake is a firm one, but not a death-grip. Death-grips can imply aggressive or controlling tendencies. Also, not firmly gripping one’s hand upon shaking can display a lack of respect or give an impression of insecurity.
Do not invade personal space.
Upon first meeting, do not stand too close to the other individual or touch them unnecessarily. Standing close or giving pats on the backs are fine for friends, but this person is not yet a close acquaintance and is certainly not a friend.
Stand up straight.
Slouching gives the impression of laziness, lack of maturity, and impoliteness. In addition to these qualities, not standing straight often displays a lack of motivation.
If introduced to a couple, engage both parties in conversation.
This is especially true of male-to-male conversation. Often, due to cultural sexism, women are excluded from conversations for no apparent reason aside from their gender. The same, however, can be true of female-to-female conversation.
Respect cultural customs and observances.
In the sense of cultural differences, simply observe and attempt to follow. If you do not understand a certain custom, politely ask for an explanation so that you to may follow. Individuals will often take very kindly to a sincere interest in their customs. An area often ignored when referring to culture is religious culture. For example, many religious individuals will find the use of God’s name, when used without proper context, offensive. Also certain commonly used phrases that make use of what is often considered serious religious terminology may be offensive (“Give a damn,” “Chance in hell,” etc).
Do not discuss the details of your job or personal life.
The person just met you, so an in-depth conversation regarding your personal life will often appear entirely self-centered and needy. If personal details are to be discussed, stay to the point. “My name is (name) and I work as a (job title)” After this brief description, allow the other individual to provide a description.
After finishing the conversation, remember a polite goodbye.
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A “Nice to meet you, (name)” will establish that the conversation went well and that it would be acceptable to have further conversations in the future. Make sure to reference the person’s name as it shows detail to attention.
