Do you ever go out to social functions, sit alone in a corner, and wonder what it is that everyone finds so funny, or what it is that makes people be able to talk and never run out of breath?
You might be surprised that many people like you, are in that crowd of people standing in the middle of the floor, laughing along with the others, but if anyone were to address them directly, they'd just die from embarrassment, they wouldn't know what to say. Heck, they are shy. It's not a crime to be shy.
It's a shame that people are shy, as they loose out on so much in life. The worst part of it all is, they really don't have to be shy at all, all they have to do for the most part, is get off that chair they are sitting on, and be a part of the crowd. For the shy person, he or she may think I'm off my nut, but not likely, here's why.
The world has far more shy people in it, than out-going people, and I know this for a fact, I used to be the shy type, until one day I decided that I had sat in that darned chair in the corner long enough. I wanted to become one of the gang, and have a good laugh at the same time.
Trembling with fear, because I knew no one in the room, I managed to get myself over to the bar, where a bunch of people seemed to be having a good time. I didn't mix right in. Rather, I stood on the edge of the group, and decided to check them out, one at a time. I wanted to see who the talkers were, and who were the people who laughed so loudly that it was nearly over-bearing. With great intensity, I looked everyone in the face, and then I saw something that nearly made me have a heart attack.
Out of a group of about 10 people, only two or three of them were actually talking, the others seemed to be hanger's on, the ones who didn't say a word, but laughed at nearly every word. I figured them to be as shy as I was, but they didn't let on they were shy.
They just joined in, even though it seemed to me that some of these people gathered around the three or so who were doing all the talking, didn't know the others. I thought to myself, if they can do it, so can I, and the next night, at the same bar, that's exactly what I did, I joined the group of laughers even though I have to admit, I didn't exactly find their jokes that funny, but I let on that I did.
As time progressed, I knew it was only a matter of time when someone would come out of the wall, to ask me some stupid question, that I had no answer for. When it did happen, I just reversed it back to the person who asked the question, making him look like the fool instead of me.
It worked, and right then and there I gained confidence that I never knew existed, and that's when it all happened for me. I let my guard down, I joined in on conversations, even if I had no idea what people were talking about, I was high on talking, and no way was I ever going to sit in that darned chair again.
I don't know how many books I read to keep myself up to date on the subjects that everyone seemed to be talking about. Then I made a decision, I was going to lead the conversation. Not bad for a guy, who a few weeks before, was sitting in the chair in the corner, so the evening before the next day of work, I dove into the local Newspaper, and read if from the front page to the last page, advertising included.
After work I went to the bar, ordered a beer, and started talking to some guy about the daily news. He responded to my conclusions, on what I had read, and the next thing I knew there were people starting to gather around waiting to hear, what the two of us were talking about. That night I gained so much confidence in myself, that when I walked across the floor, it seemed as though I was walking on a cushion of air.
Being confident in yourself can take you a long way from sitting in that chair in the corner, and it doesn't take much to gain that confidence, you just have to get off your butt and join in with others. They don't bite as I learned. Actually, I was surprised at how many of the people standing in the group didn't seem to have a good clue as to who was doing the talking.
I Was Shy Around Women
Joining a group of people, who were just shooting the bull, was one thing. Actually asking one of the women, if she'd like a drink was another. If there was one thing that really has helped me in life, is that I was always a bit bold, so I got around to thinking that maybe the girl I was about to offer a drink to, was just about as shy as I was. Bingo! Right on! Turned out that the girl I offered the drink to was as shy, as I was.
Again, my ego was boosted, especially when she accepted, and we enjoyed an evening of un-easy, but nice conversation. That was ok, at least I wasn't sitting in that darned chair anymore and with more attempts to talk to women, I was gaining more confidence, and on it went. Even being refused, by a woman for a drink, didn't really bother me that much, heck, I was in a room full of women, surely, one of them, would be thirsty.
That was a long time ago, and now some people actually call me motor mouth, the shyness is long gone. I'm out-going and can speak on most subjects, though I don't even have a High School degree. That matters not, all one has to do is follow the conversation, become one of the group, and you're life is going to change in more ways than one. As confidence grows, so do you as a person, and that's when you look over your shoulder towards that darned chair. You see some poor person sitting in the same spot you used to sit in, wishing they were a part of whatever is going on. That's when you can have a little chuckle to yourself thinking about that poor person so far away, in that lonely chair in the corner, just wishing they had the guts to talk, like everyone else.
On a personal note, not all people are as lucky as I was, and many people suffer from loneliness because they are shy. If you want to make someone's day, do yourself a big favor and go and talk to that lonely person sitting way in the corner, in that darned chair. Not only will that person feel better, you will too.
