Well I think everyone at some point has wanted to feel more confident and independent including myself, and of course along the way you make some mistakes that you really regret. Speaking from personal experience when you decide that you want to change yourself especially your personality, always remember that it won't just happen over night. I suppose the main thing to remember when trying to reinvent yourself is that it will take time so try and be patient, whatever the reason for your change be it a failed relationship because of a partner cheating or because you may have been embarrassed or even humiliated; just take your time and follow these easy to do steps.
Discover your own pros and cons, if you feel it easier to list them then do so and be totally honest with yourself. Look firstly at the cons and decide for each one what you can do to try and change them or at least make them nearer to pros than cons. Of course you can't change everything but if your major fault for example is that you can be paranoid about the slightest thing, take small steps to change that by possibly including a friend to help. If you feel the need to call your partner every 15mins when they are out try and increase the time space you call them, if you find it really hard try and add an extra 5mins onto it. With time it will get easier and you may only call them every 2 hours when they are out, I know it seems a bit extreme but some people do have this as a con. With your pros focus on them and make sure the people around you know your pros, if you are really good at telling jokes boost your confidence by telling them to a group of people. Your confidence will increase dramatically once everyone knows how humorous you can be and you will feel even more comfortable around them.
Treat yourself once in a while, be it a complete makeover or something a bit more physical like F1 racing. A makeover can do wonders for women I know personally when I have had my hair done at a salon I feel like a new woman and dare I say it more attractive, this new found confidence will radiate from you and people will notice even if you think they don't. Doing something you enjoy makes you feel better about yourself and more relaxed, the more relaxed you are the more relaxed people are around you.
At the end of the day there is an extreme amount of willpower that has to be involved for this, this can be the hardest part for most as for example when deciding to lose weight it is your own willpower that drives you. Just remember if you have a good friend beside you helping out then you can't go wrong, they will be there to watch your back. If you don't have anyone like that then even involving a close family member could help like your mother or brother. Keep your head up and don't get yourself down if things don't seem to be going right, everything takes time.
