I Don't Have To Look Beautiful

Sometimes when I'm lost in my head I get to observe a myriad of random thoughts passing through my mind. It's like watching a movie, but with words, a soundtrack. This is where some of my writing comes from, just a germ of an idea or a sentence that really grabs my attention. I see something deeper in its simplicity and the wisdom that can be gleaned if I exercise some critical thinking to the observation. Now, I like to dress good. I like to feel sexy and attractive. How I present myself and care for myself is important. It's not about how I look to others either, its how I look to myself and how it makes me feel; now on to a different tack.

Tonight I attended what was promoted as a seminar. It wasn't, it was a sales pitch. It's related to the coaching industry; my profession. So I was naturally curious and attended hoping to learn something new. They didn't reveal very much at all but what I did hear did resonate with what I'm already doing. I am curious to know more about what they're doing, particularly since it wasn't really revealed in any concrete way what they do different than anyone else. They do claim to have a revolutionary model that transforms lives, but who doesn't make that claim when in the human potential field.

Listening to some of the statements, I recognized some common truths that are foundational to my particular style and nature of coaching my clients. This is from a spiritual centre that gives the client more access to their faculties, emotions, etc. The giveaway to the possible hook and credibility failure to the program is the dependency factor. It's a come back for more, for more, for more. They sounded so thorough in it's' power and success that I would have suspected revolutionary changes available for a client and the tools to continue, more or less, self-sufficient. This is an important factor to me. Teaching the man to fish leads to self-sufficiency.

When I work with my clients it may take some time to reach this point but this is my goal. My focus is not just to reach the goal they hired me to help realize in their life but to also impart the skills that will serve them well in the future as well. These skills develop a new level of awareness and critical thinking - or in another way, reflective or observational thinking - that integrates experience, emotions, feelings, thoughts, and looks deeper than the stimulus reaction. Coaching may still be an option in the future, but for the most part, it's for the opportunity to work on something specific with a clearer focus and ability to get there much quicker. I know for myself, I enjoy processing my thoughts through conversation with another who can facilitate deep conversations. In doing so I discover my truths on my own but the conversation itself was the catalyst. The structure of coaching really has proven to facilitate these conversations better than any other I've had over the past 10 years.

Walking home this evening, a thought went through my mind while I reflected on the seminar. I don't have to be beautiful; I just have to be good. This was my thought. I loved it and it made me curious. What do you mean by beautiful? What do you mean by good? Just as quickly the meaning became clear, you know how quickly the mind can work. Being beautiful isn't what is important, being good is. Being good is about me, not you. It's important to be good to myself and honor my values. People relationships are a part of my values, as I believe they are with most of us. I've been told many times that I'm a beautiful man. I don't know if there is any better compliment.

Living my life as I see fit, which for me is being as open as I can, constantly challenging myself, loving everyone (and people who know me will attest to my genuine love), and being true to myself. Now I don't always get it right and I do have bad days or moments. This is why being good to me also means being forgiving. Now, I also know that doing these things benefits others. By being forgiving to myself I naturally will be forgiving of others as well. Life and relationships all of a sudden becomes easier. My warmth and compassion are absorbed by everyone and just by being good, I am beautiful. Their testimonials have humbled me in that regard more than once.