Women can also help to protect themselves by being cautious when they go out on dates. Group dates and double dates are perfect for the first few dates because they give the woman an opportunity to see what kind of person this new suitor is. After a few groups dates, going on solo dates can be considered a safe option. When going out on dates, a woman should plan to pay for her own meal to avoid any expectations of sexual favors. It is also imperative to make it known in the beginning that there is no plan or expectation of sexual activity. While such a conversation may be awkward, it will make the woman's position clear from the start of the date and remove any perceived pressure regarding sex. Women need to overcome any discomfort that is caused by discussing sex openly with a potential date. Talking about what is acceptable and what is not acceptable early in a relationship is important because if a man knows from the beginning that the woman is not intending to become sexually involved, then he can not say that she has given him any mixed signals along the way. It is also important for a woman to know how she will get home and to avoid inviting the new love interest into her home unless there are other adults around to provide a much needed safety net.6 Dating is a wonderful opportunity to get to know somebody as long as it is done safely. Being prepared to call a friend or a cab to provide transportation is always a good idea.
While dating is wonderful, choosing whom to date can be tricky. It is important to be selective when choosing potential suitors. Men who exhibit aggression by being too touchy or by invading personal space are not likely to be good choices. Likewise, a man who is overly suggestive or sexual in his speech early in a relationship should be eliminated from the dating options. Any man who makes controlling decisions for the woman early in the relationship should also be removed from the list of dating options.7 Men who display these types of behaviors are more likely to become forceful and sexually aggressive, leading to date rape.
The absolute best defense that a woman has when confronted with the possibility of being a victim of rape is to trust her own instincts. Women have an innate sense of the world around them and when something is not quite right, their instincts set off alarms to notify them that they need to arm themselves. This inner sense of warning is far too often ignored or dismissed by women because they are taught to be polite at all times and reacting to these warnings may well be perceived as rude or inappropriate. If a woman will become attuned to her intuition and resolve to never ignore those warning bells, she will decrease her chances of being victimized just by listening to her own body's clues.
Conclusion
Date rape can happen to anyone and can be committed by any type of person. In order to build a plan for protecting oneself, it is imperative to study and understand the techniques that a rapist might employ in order to commit his crime. Studies indicate that 60% of college-aged men would resort to physical force within their sexual relationships if they knew for certain that they would get away with forcing a woman to have sex with them. This is a startling statistic and should be made widely known to all women, particularly those of college -age. Sadly, many men feel entitled to sexual favors whenever they have purchased drinks or dinner for a woman. That sense of entitlement often leads them to behave in inappropriate ways. As with most issues, education should be the highest priority for changing this attitude of entitlement to an attitude of respect. If society continues to allow men to feel as though they are entitled to sex without regard to the desires of the woman involved, then acquaintance rape will continue to be such a major and devastating problem for the world. While it is understood that men are sometimes also victimized by date rapists, women are generally targeted more frequently as an easier victim of acquaintance rape. Because women are more likely to be targeted as a victim of rape, women should take initiative to educate themselves in the methods and profile indicators of the rapist and what to do in the event that they are targeted for this heinous crime.
Being aware of one's surroundings is definitely the most important aspect of developing and implementing a plan of action for protecting oneself. Without that awareness, a potential victim has no way of foreseeing the danger surrounding them. In addition to being aware of the area, it is also important to take note of the way the people in the area are behaving. If a person is behaving strangely or makes the woman uncomfortable for any reason, finding an escape route and reacting immediately without concern for how she will be viewed is the best course of action.
Women often struggle with their upbringing, where they were taught to be acquiescent and compliant with the men in their lives. It is difficult to overcome the natural inclination to please someone and be polite and kind. In order to protect oneself from being victimized, a woman must learn to become aggressive on her own behalf and stand up for her own rights even though these actions may be viewed as improper and unladylike behavior.
The police force should also begin to take date rape more seriously and investigate these cases as thoroughly as possible. In the past, date rape has been viewed as being nothing more than a case of buyer's remorse where the woman initially wanted to have sexual intercourse with the man and then decided afterwards that she was coerced or forced into the activity because she views the sexual act to be immoral or wrong. In order to clear her own conscience, she claims that she was forced into the sexual act instead of being a willing participant. Police are now starting to recognize that this is not generally the case and women are frequently being forced into sexual activity with a man who feels he is entitled to these favors for having provided dinners and other activities associated with dating.
Harsher sentences should also be enacted for those who are found to be guilty of perpetrating this horrible crime against someone. Currently, the sentencing practices for date rape is fairly low when compared to the sentencing practices for other rapists. This could be caused by any number of factors. However, the sentencing should be brought into line with those sentences exacted on other rapists in order to increase the level of deterrence for committing this crime.
Through education and planning, women and men can greatly reduce their risks of being victimized by someone who intends to commit an act of rape. There are many actions that can be taken to reduce one's risk of becoming a victim. Just as safety is not a given, neither is victimization. Women do have the power to protect themselves if they follow these guidelines when they go out on the town with or without a date.
I think it's wrong 4 men 2 force women 2 have sex. I thing if they don't want 2 have sex, they don't need 2 B with that person. Think all women have the right 2 choose who they want 2 B with & feel comfortible with. 4 all the men think they right 2 do that, they schould B in Prison 4 the rest of there lives.
#2 by Shaunalynn, Jul 31, 2008
Marshall, I agree. However, it should be noted that rap - in any form - is rarely about sex. Rape generally has far more to do with using power against the victims.
