Understand the Dynamics of the Mother-In-Law/Daughter-In-Law Relationship
Your husband may have a difficult time understanding why you and your mother in law occasionally butt heads, or worse. You have to understand that his mother was the closest female to him as he grew from a child into an adult. Sometimes mommy has a hard time letting go of her little boy. Sometimes your husband has a difficult time letting go of his mother. Both of you each have your own opinions on what is best for the same man, and probably do not agree on every issue.
The best solution to this situation is to explain to your husband that, as his wife, he must hold you and your ideas in the same regard he holds his mother. You must also ask him to stand up for you, if necessary, but only for valid reasons. If you and your mother in law disagree about the best method to remove a stain, let it go. If she condemns the way you and your husband raise your children, ask him to step in. With time, your husband will understand a little more, and your mother in law should respect the life choices the two of you make together. Sometimes you have to accept and respect your mother in law first, and she will soon follow.
Relate to PMS, Bloating, Cramping, Etc.
Because your husband has never, and will never, experience menstrual problems of his own, it is very difficult for him to understand what you are going through. His lack of understanding or sympathy is not selfishness, it is just the fact that he doesn't actually physically go through it, so he cannot possibly relate.
Next month, explain to your husband that you do not mean to be emotional, or aggressive, and to please excuse your behavior. Explain to him that your menstrual cycle makes you uncomfortable, and/or causes substantial pain. Also, hormone changes during that time cause you to feel and act the way you do. Maybe ask him to rub your back to alleviate some of that nagging back pain or to draw you a hot bath to soak in. If he has the ability to do something to increase your comfort level, he will actually feel like he is helping and will probably offer that back rub again next month. Always keep in mind that your monthly makes you moody or emotional, even when you may not want to admit it, and try to make an effort not to treat him unfairly.
Love Your Best Friend(s) as Much as You Do
You and your best friend have connected on a deeper level than causal friendship and each of you provides something valuable to the other. You lean on each other in times of need and rejoice in the others good fortunes. Despite all of this, you notice that your husband and your best friend do not quite connect like you wish they would.
It is important to keep in mind that your husband may not bond to your best friend the way you have. Maybe they don't share quite as much in common or do not have any common interests other than you. Always make sure that you make plenty of time for each of them separately. If either feels left out to make room for the other, they will have a harder time accepting each other. Try to plan nights out or activities that would appeal to both. Also, explain to each how important it is to you that they enjoy each others company. Usually with time, the both of them will invest feelings in each other, and before you know it, they may have their own significant friendship with one another.
Stop Being a Kid at Heart
Men usually still enjoy many activities that they did while they were younger, even after they have grown up and said, “I Do.” Maybe your guy likes to play video games, take part in paintball gun wars, or plays with the kids toys more than they do. Yes, it may be irritating but let's look at this closer.
It is healthy in a relationship when both partners maintains their playful sides. How boring would it be if he was serious all the time? The next time he leaves you inside so he can go play outside, suggest some fun activities you can do together, that you will also enjoy. Maybe you should go to an amusement park, mini golf, bowling, etc. Get him away from his Xbox, and take him somewhere fun. Besides, when you look out the kitchen window and see him playing wholeheartedly with the kids in the backyard, would you really have it any other way?
Never Look at Another Woman Ever
Men love to look to women. Most of the time it is not meant in a demeaning way to you or the other woman. Men like to look at a woman and recognize the specific beauty that each individual woman holds. They can appreciate beauty in another woman without it having any affect on how he feels about you.
If it makes you uncomfortable when your husband's eyes wander, explain to him how it makes you feel and ask him not to do it around you. Don't get too mad at him though, I'm sure you noticed that new cute guy at the coffee shop down the street, or the hunky guy who mows your neighbors lawn every Tuesday. In the end, you both want each other, that's all that matters.
