“Rape crisis line. Can I help you?”
The voice is tentative. According to my training, I ask her if she is in a safe place to talk. She is. I invite her to tell me what is going on. I listen to her story, letting her know I understand by paraphrasing, another skill I learned in training. I hear her relax as she realizes she is understood and I am supportive. After she talks, I tell her about our services. She's not ready to use them, but I encourage her to call back.
Fast-forward 15 Years
The student is upset. He hesitantly describes how much he loved his girlfriend who just broke up with him. He is having difficulty with the university program I coordinate. I paraphrase his statements and make sure my body language communicates warmth and respect. He becomes more confident. As he finishes his story, I offer him new alternatives. Although he is still depressed when he leaves my office, his spirits have buoyed because he knows that he will have support from me.
How I Got Started
I began as a volunteer on a rape crisis line. Before answering my first phone call, I underwent training that taught me about police and hospital procedures, the psychology of rape and recovery, and how to listen and respond to a person in crisis.
Although it has been eighteen years since I last answered a rape crisis phone call, I have used these skills in every job I have held since then.
Listening Skills
Social services that offer volunteer training often include listening skills, such as paraphrasing, giving the person a chance to tell his or her story, and communicating acceptance (even if you disagree with that person's choices). When people in crisis feel accepted and listened to, they can begin to unravel their problems.
Using Listening Skills
Across many fields, deadlines, conflicts with co-workers, economic stresses, fears of layoffs, change, and personal struggles create crises. If you have the skills to talk with someone in crisis, you can de-escalate the problem and help the person work constructively toward solution.
How to Learn Crisis Line Listening Skills
In order to get crisis-management skills, investigate local social services and ask about their volunteer training. Possibilities include: suicide prevention hotlines, health-related hotlines (e.g, AIDS or cancer), and shelters for the homeless or for family violence. Often you will make a commitment to volunteering following the training. While this may seem intimidating, it is the only way to perfect your skills and most agencies will offer support while you answer your first phone calls.
In Sum…
Yes, there are heartbreaks in crisis line work and these are unforgettable. Also unforgettable are the many times when a friendly voice on the phone made a difference in a person's life. Crisis line training is available. It will give you skills you can use in many other parts of your life-and while you obtain and practice these skills, you will know that you are helping other people.
