I have always considered self-mutilation to be one of the severest of emotional problems, but had not considered the personal aspects of such a problem. There are various forms of mutilation that can occur and they can take on differing levels of intensity. Some people with this condition are hair pullers, who when alone and unobserved, yank out their hair with what appears to be profound interest, leaving behind bald-spots which they then attempt to cover with skillful hair styling. Others are cutters, who use razor blades to slash their arms, wrists, wherever. You can usually tell a cutter by the rows and rows of straight line scars on their skin. Another similar aspect of self-mutilation is the picker, who breaks the skin using only the fingernails as cutting implements. The scars in those cases often look a lot like cigarette burns due to their symmetrical round shape. Quite often when asked, they will claim these marks to be burns of some kind.
Having known a picker for quite some time, I was able to glean some information that could bring to light some surprising facts about self-mutilation. First of all, the person involved does not think of it as being abnormal in any way while the mutilation is going on, but afterward will try to hide the scratches and little bleeding wounds behind plausible lies. “The cat scratched me, the dog bit me, I burned myself…etc.” The only thing is, these people seem to suffer these injuries a lot, and almost always have open sores on various limbs of their bodies.
Is it a form of mental illness or is it something acquired in early childhood that then becomes habit, or is it a combination of the two? Apparently, to the person suffering from this condition, it is not a mental illness, but is instead a nervous condition. Whether the two are intertwined or not is up to the medical professionals to decide, but all I can go on is what I have learned. In this particular person's case, the problems began around the age of four, and can apparently be traced to a Grandmother who also was a picker. The Grandmother had multiple open sores on her arms, legs, and face, and was continuously picking at them. The four year old saw this, thought it to be completely normal behavior, and volunteered to help the Grandmother pick the scabs. For the Grandmother this WAS perfectly normal behavior.
Surprisingly, the Grandmother agreed, and the child picked her scabs, leaving small, bleeding open wounds in the flesh. Shortly thereafter, the child also became a picker, picking at fingertips and hang-nails until every finger was bloody and sore all the time. This person has been a picker for life and reveals that there does not appear to be mental illness involved and in fact, feels perfectly normal, but considers this condition to be just a really bad habit. A habit that has caused round scars and open sores to appear all over both the arms and the legs.
The urge to pick apparently, comes from a deep-seated need to be doing something, anything with the fingers. It is a sign of boredom and nervous tension. The person in question reveals that the only time the urge to pick occurs is when there is nothing to do and the hands are left idle. This person would never even consider slashing at the skin with razors. I do not know if a cutter has similar problems or if that situation is of another course entirely, but I can imagine that there are some similarities involved. Stress, for example is certainly not ruled out as an instigator for an episode of cutting or picking.
A lot of people who are perfectly normal will pick at a scab and get it bleeding again, and usually this is done out of sheer boredom, or having nothing better to do with their hands. But in the case of obsessive picking, the difference lies in the sheer volume of open sores and scars that occur as a result of this picking urge. Pain and bleeding are apparently not an issue, because those things do not appear to stop the obsessive picker from mutilation. Masochism of a sort may factor in as well, due to the fact that occasionally they even enjoy the pain that the picking causes, and may even claim to feel more alert afterward because of the “alarming” qualities of pain.
To me, this is a fascinating study, with many levels that can't be included here, but are interesting never-the-less. Is a mental illness involved here? If so, what illness? A form of depression? Or, could it possibly be exactly what the person involved claims it to be: Boredom and bad habit? Could it be that there is more to it than that? Again, this is for the professionals to decide.
