I know, I know. Sometimes, it's hard enough to find a man-any man. But believe me, sometimes it's better to have no man at all than to be involved with the wrong one. Here are a few signs that you're dating Mr. Very Wrong:
- He's jobless or always broke. A man who can't pay for your dates has no business asking you out. If he has no qualms about letting the woman support him while he's just dating her, don't expect him to be a better provider when he's married.
- He brags about grave delinquencies or a criminal past. Unfortunately, many women see men like this as "exciting". That's extremely foolish. While we have all broken the law at one time or another, people with healthy psyches are ashamed to admit it. A person who is proud of such misadventures has an anti-social personality. He will have no qualms about lying to you, betraying your trust, or having an affair.
- He is addicted to drugs, alcohol or pornography. It is a different thing to have such addictions in his past. It may have strengthened his character if he has truly overcome them. But a recovered alcoholic NEVER touches alcohol. And a person who uses addictive drugs or views pornography AT ALL is an addict whether anybody thinks so or not. Don't try to compete with a chemical or computer image for your man's affection-you will lose. Believe it or not, there are actually good men out there who will spare you of such baggage.
- He habitually works overtime. This may not seem like a problem now, but if he carries this habit after marriage, you will be lonely woman stuck with a sugar daddy, but no husband.
- He is unavailable on Christmas OR Valentine's Day OR his birthday. Three words: He's Already Married. Don't fall for that bullshit about his mother wanting the whole family together on holidays. It may sound sweet, but he's a grown man who will do anything to spend at least part of the day with the person most important to him. If that's not you, it's probably his wife.
- He is always VERY late for your dates. He probably has other "commitments". (He's dating other women, or he has errands to run for his wife.)
- He won't let you meet his friends. He has other "commitments". (His friends know he's married to, or dating, someone else.)
- He seldom sees you more than twice a week, and only for a few hours. He has other "commitments".
- He seldom dates you in public. His wife or her friends might see you.
- He makes a big deal about the privacy of his cellphone. Here's news: men with nothing to hide take pride in letting their girlfriends take their calls and keep their phones when they are together. If your man's phone is hands-off to you, you can be sure he is hiding something from you. Most likely, it's his other "commitments".
Ladies, I know it can be pretty lonely being single. I've been there. But believe me, it's far better to be lonely than to be miserable. (I've been there too.)
There are plenty of good fish in the sea, but we often miss them because we are too busy trying to catch bad ones, because they are more "exciting". But marriage-if that's what you're aiming for-is a complicated thing, and once you're there, making it work with even the most boring, nice guy will still be more excitement than you bargained for.
So give yourself some credit and don't settle for just any man. You can have a good man who will treat you right, keep your trust, and love you and you alone. Once and for all, get rid of the wrong men in your life, and you will be much more likely to find the right one.
