It's an experience almost everyone has had at least once in their lives. You come across someone in a public situation of some sort and it seems there might be some sort of spark there. It could be anywhere: a restaurant, theater, party, etc - but there's something that might have a chance of going further. However, for some reason, things somehow seem not to happen and you're back where you started. I'm talking of course about the ships passing situation, that moment where you come across someone that may be compatible on some level only to never cross paths afterwards. While it doesn't always have to have some sort of romantic or sexual attraction, the ones we remember most usually are like that.
My most recent experience with this was meeting someone at their going away party just before she went away to school. The party was winding down and what was supposed to be just a few minutes in her living room listening to music turned into an alcohol fueled conversation that lasted until the sun came up. It was one of those moments where two strangers who needed to talk to someone found a common thread between them in the process. Some say to strike at the moment and make the next move. Others would say to take it slowly and see where it leads.
“If I took the initiative maybe I could've gotten a one night stand or a fling out of it” I thought. I was waiting for a signal that could allow me to take things to the next level and see what happened.
However, there was no signal to the best of my knowledge and it remained pretty much where it started. Why didn't I act on impulse? There were some potential reasons. It could've been my not having protection on me and the awkwardness of that if the heat of the moment arose. It could've also been the fact that we just met, despite the alcohol intake on both parties. While these two factors may have played a subtle part I think the fact she was in a vulnerable state at the moment, scared and even freaking out a little bit over the road ahead that kept things pretty much stuttering towards nothingness. It was something I noticed at the time and realized that it would be wrong to do anything that took advantage of where she was at. I think she knew it too, as she didn't give out any signals for me to move ahead and see what happened.
We both knew a relationship was never meant to emerge from this encounter. A friend (who was my ride, ironically enough) said I should've asked her out before she actually moved. I even considered it but the next time I saw her, I realized she seemed kind of embarrassed over the whole thing. Whether it was because she was now sober or just remembering what happened and worrying about it, I don't know. What I did know was that the sparks needed just for a fling, much less a relationship, weren't there. We exchanged contact information and wished each other well.
It's one of the oldest stories around, and something we've all been through. This occasion where there may have been a slight chance but things just weren't meant to be. We know there are instances where acting on a thought could lead it to something more, but this wasn't one of those instances. Instead we move forward and go on with our lives. Maybe once in a while we wonder what could've been, but deep down we know it's not to be. It's just another instance of ships passing.
