Experts tell us that there are certain telltale signs when someone is lying. Once you know what to look for, you can spot deception and dishonesty more readily because you can identify the behavior of a liar.
Telltale Signs That Someone is Lying
Pay Attention to Your Gut Reaction
Your instincts are telling you something doesn't add up. That twinge of unease may be an alert that something is out of kilter. You may, in fact, be tapping into subtle tip-offs.
Verbal Cues of Lying
- Watch for hesitation or pauses. The person may be attempting to line his ducks up in a row, making sure that what he is now telling you is similar to what he has already said.
- Does the person repeat back to you, the question you just asked? For example, you ask: “Did you do it?” The other person responds: “So, you're asking if I did it?” You find yourself feeling frustrated-and justifiably so. The other person is stalling.
- He or she attempts to change the subject
Does the Story Change?
If the story you are being told changes, this may be an indicator that deception is being used. Is a consistent picture presented or does the story “evolve”?
Subtle Facial Cues of a Liar
Facial expressions can sometimes be a giveaway. A person smiles but the smile doesn't reach his eyes. She seems nervous yet smiles as if nothing is wrong. He says one thing but his expression says something else-you see a smirk when he is supposedly expressing sincerity.
Changed Behavior
If you know how someone usually acts and reacts and their behavior seems out of sync, they may be using deception. Behavior can change when someone is dishonest and is trying to act truthful. Watch for behavior that seems different from the norm.
Fleeting Expressions
Have you ever seen an expression cross someone's face and it was so fleeting, you wondered if you imagined it? These fleeting expressions are called microexpressions and experts say they could be clues as to how someone really feels.
Contradictory Actions
Check for anything that seems out of whack. For example, he says he was talking to a buddy but hangs up quickly or she says she's staying in yet is all dolled up.
Picking Up on Unease
Does the other person avoid meeting your eyes when he/she normally would? Check body language for what it reveals. Do you see fidgeting, sweating, neck rubbing or throat clearing?
Trying to Put You on the Defensive
Have you ever questioned someone's behavior and then found the tables have been turned on you? A deceptive person may call into question your motives, in an attempt to deflect attention from his or her own actions.
Unnecessary Explanations
If someone seems to be offering you a great amount of detail, much thought may have gone in to the explanation. In other words, they may be attempting to cover their tracks with a long narrative. The saying: “Me thinks he doth protest too much” may be an apt description of the behavior of a liar.
Watching carefully, you may be able to spot lying and deception: telltale signs, revealed through telling behavior.
Great article. Now I would know who's lying.