Socyberty > Relationships

Cheating: So Often, So Common, So True

Insight into the reasons people cheat their partners in relationships. This phenomena is increasing by the day, making the society and the meaning of relationships hollow.

There are many euphemisms used to describe it, having an "undercover lover"; "a woman on the side"; "two-timing', "three-timing", "multi timing", but no matter what it's called it amounts to one thing, cheating. And the capital letters are intentional because no matter what the reason it's a terrible thing to do to someone who has put their trust in you.

But leaving aside the why's and how's of cheating a fact that you can't get away from is that an alarming number of men cheat on their partners. Experts estimate that nearly 75 per cent of married men or men involved in serious relationships cheat. That means that out of every four men three are unfaithful to their partners. But it's a misconception that "only" men cheat. Women are also equally capable of being unfaithful.

Decades back women never stepped out of their homes and never had an opportunity to cheat. But in today's time when our society is in a transitional phase, roles of both sexes are blurred. If given an opportunity both men and women cheat. Cheating is no more a gender issue.

Having concluded that people cheat the question arises as to why they cheat. So why do men cheat. Traditionally the male sex drive was likened to an uncontrollable beast. Men just couldn't "get" enough. So not satisfied with one partner they cheated on her with one or more women. And this "Other Woman/Women" were supposed to be the proverbial femme fatale. Siren-like she was supposed to ensnare the man who was only too happy to be ensnared because after all he was looking for, what else, more sex.

So is this all true? Are men all on the look out for sex, sex and more sex? Not true says the latest research. Men cheat not only because their sexual needs are unfulfilled but because their emotional needs are unfulfilled too. Although, probably finding answers may not be simple but some reasons as to why men cheat may help us gain insight of this trait.

No matter how smooth his serious relationship is, men are in constant search of thrill in their lives. They tend to be unsatisfied with their existence until they get adrenalin rush every now and then. Having multiple flings apart from their commitment brings back that excitement for them. And unfortunately for women, men can easily do it without much of conscience pricking.

We know that a man likes to get his ego boosted from time to time. For men its mostly about quantity than quality. The more women he has to boast of, the more his ego is pumped. Most of the young teenaged boys are keen on "trophy hunting", some grown up men just cannot move out of that phase and keep looking for hook ups just out of habit if nothing else. Some men just refuse to grow up.

Both the sexes are equally vulnerable to being attracted to someone. Now when such a situation arises for an individual, what should he or she do? I say, firstly accept it. Don't deny the fact to yourself. A strong willpower immensely helps to overcome this dilemma and not get carried away.

Resistance & being considerate can save many relationships & may be this swiftly getting hollow society too.

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Comments (7)
#1 by tracy sardelli, Mar 24, 2008
interesting view, thanks for sharing.
#2 by DM Parker, Mar 26, 2008
So true. Too many people lack character today.
#3 by Josey, Mar 27, 2008
Sad, but true!
#4 by Mansi Saini, Mar 28, 2008
Thanks to you all! :) I'll check out your write ups too!
#5 by nobert soloria bermosa, Apr 3, 2008
i absolutely agree with you especially with the last line,that will save a lot of relationships.
#6 by Rana Sinha, May 3, 2008
Great article Mansi.

Earlier societies had lots of supporting structures to help people in times of low in their relationships but these are fast vanishing. In todays media-driven carnivale society of short attention spans, we have become too egoistic and self-centred to think of other people's needs. Needs can be met in different ways, but if we lack the skills, these needs drive us and hijack relationships.
It would be great to read if you have any thoughts on how people could get help in their relationships.
#7 by Rookie Expert, May 21, 2008
Bitter Truth!
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