I could give you all kinds of statistics on how many people do what to whoever and all the numbers on how many people win and lose at love. But that is just it, you can not predict what is going to happen in any relationship based on numbers or someone else who may have been scorned. You need to figure out what is up with you and your significant other and not make yourself a statistic by reading others. I wanted to write this article about how to play a player because I used to get stuck in the numbers, books and tips and I used to spend all my energy listening to them instead of looking at what was really happening. Everyone is different and just because the person you want is acting a certain way does not mean they are falling into any category. All the information you find is just meant to help you take a look at what you are seeing and know you are not alone. Everyone has either been played or has played someone and they may not even know it.
Here's the guidelines. The dictionary basically defines a player as someone who performs, could be sports, music or any other type of thing. I guess that is why we have now coined the phrase in relationships. When you have been played someone has performed for you and you have fallen into a game. That person has performed and made you feel like the star. When in reality they only wanted your attention for the time being and will let you loose when it's over. This has nothing to do with who you are or how gullible you may be. This is their problem. Most players are looking for attention and you just happen to be there. So please, do not take it personally. I tell my friends, “there are empty people and full people. Empty people will fill their lives with as many people as possible so that they feel full and full people can stand alone and have other people because they enjoy them, not because they need them.” Players are empty people.
How can you spot a player? They always have a wingman, or woman, depending on their choice, the point is that they never stand alone. The only time you find a player standing alone is if they are out for revenge or if they aren't really a player, they are a liar. The difference is that a player is out to pull people in and use them for what they can and a liar is someone who is unhappy with who they are and wants to be a player. Or I guess their could be psycho's that look like either, but we can talk about that another time.
Besides the wingman a player will also not approach directly. They will smile at you from across the room, walk by and have the wingman watch for your reaction, really anything to gauge who you are before they come and talk. A good player will not always say what you want to hear because they don't want you to know that you are about to be played. So far I think I have described just about all the situations for any kind of person you may meet. Confused? Sorry, were getting there.
Before you fall head over heals for whatever they use to hook you watch them with other people. Are they the moving around and doing the same thing to others? You might say yes but that really doesn't mean you are being played yet. They live off your reaction. So file that one in the back of your head and lets move on, slowly.
If you have a problem keeping their attention, examples, if their friends walk up and whisper to them while they are talking to you or if they are standing near by and smacking their arm every once in a while. Do they check their phone often but not answer it. You need to learn to read them. I guess that would be the hardest part. Knowing if you have their full attention is pretty important but if you are already hooked then it will be hard to see. So don't fall for the line, just absorb it and enjoy it but keep your mind clear. I think the funniest line I have ever heard was, “I thought that the sun had shined my whole life until I saw you smile and I realized I had never seen it shine so bright.” Oh my gosh, the poor guy who fed me that one heard me laughing for hours and never came near me again. I hate lines, they are stupid attempts to hook you from the start. A good player won't usually give you one of those right away, that is why they stand back and watch you, they want to see how to move in. It's like poker, they have a few good cards but they are trying to read you and see if yours is better. One thing you need to remember is to talk to other people around you. I will usually talk to the people at the next table if I see someone watching me, it lets a player know that you are confident and won't be played with such an easy line. To tell you the truth I may laugh at all the lines I have been given but they are an ego boost. The person feeding them has worked on exactly what to say to you and it should make you feel good, just don't fall for it. Again, learn to read them and their sincerity. I completely ignore people who come on too strong, it's not even worth picking up the bat. Desperate people, or drunk people, are not fun and playing is suppose to be fun, right? So to make it fun.
