A great man in history has defined friendship as, "No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends"(John 15:13). One of the characters in Shakespeare's plays says, "I count myself in nothing else as happy as in a soul remembering my good friends." We all like to be considered friendly by others. Friendship is beyond definitions. It is the vital essence of human life.
FRIENDSHIP SATISFYING AND REWARDING
Friendship in itself is satisfying and rewarding. By liking other people and making them like us, it encourages self expression and enables us to find a balance of interest in external affairs invaluable to the development of our own personality. The essence of friendship and getting along with people is to cultivate the ability of putting yourself in their place, and acting accordingly. To be liked, you must be ready to make yourself likable. That is why Epicurus, the great philosopher, said, "Of all the means to insure happiness throughout the whole of life by far the most important is the acquisition of friends."
10 VITAL PRINCIPLES OF FRIENDSHIP
- Try to make others feel important. Everybody in the world wants to be treated important. Be generous with praise and recognition of their accomplishments.
- On your part, be friendly and congenial. Always arguing or striking up a quarrel on the least excuse may irritate any friendship. Feeling equal is very important in friendship.
- Encourage others to talk about themselves their families, interests, problems and experiences. Don't be beating your own drum, irritating others.
- Assure others your appreciation. Make them feel that they get your appreciation, advice and help. Let them know that they are important to you.
- Be a friend of heart and not of lips. Your words should be reliable. Always keep your word, no matter how difficult the circumstances are. Your faithfulness should enable them depend on you and realize that you will go to any lengths to keep your promise.
- Betrayal shatters any friendship. Never betray a confidence, whether deliberately or unintentionally. Never be carried away by the gossip mongers' false tales. The habit of talking carelessly, of not being able to keep a secret, is the root of breaking up friendships.
- Thiruvalluvar, a famous Tamil saint poet who lived two thousand years ago, says, "Friendship should be timely like the hand protecting ones shame when the towel slips from the loin." Stand by your friend in his distress and adversity. It is in adversities true friends are known. The saying, "A friend in need is friend indeed," is an immortal truth stating the glory of friendship. Try to help your friends in as many ways as possible. Let them feel that they have some one to turn to, as the need for companionship lies at the root of all friendship.
- Friendship is not mere flattery of words. It is the duty of a friend to check when his friend is doing something wrong. By all means, a friend should be saved from the fall.. But you should not go out of your way to call attention to the faults of your friend, unless this can be taken in the proper spirit. Don't forget that only constructive can be of much help, provided it is appreciated and not taken as a wounding remark. Some people don't like their mistakes to be corrected, as it gives them a sense of inferiority.
- Always try to share a common interest with your friend. This will serve as a bond, and also act as the motivation for many shared activities. Many friendships spring up on a playing field, in an art gallery, or in a club which caters to common interests.
- You should be aware of your friend's frame of mind, his likes and dislikes, his moods and reactions and try to adjust yourself accordingly. It does not mean that you have to tolerate any of his undesirable attitude. Tolerance is one of the foundations of friendship upon which a perfect friendship can be built.
DO NOT MISS THE GLORY OF FRIENDSHIP
Friendship is the essence of all human relationships and includes the entire personality. It also exercises a very strong influence , which should be used for the good. Friendship is an immortal asset. Let us not miss the glory of friendship.
