Love indeed is a mystery. It's the awesome chemistry that bonds two people together and keeps them together for a lifetime despite all odds. I say it keeps them together because several examples abound of couples who have had a very fulfilling lifelong love life. You can be sure that they had their fair share of love travails, but they made it. They have a scientific, tangible proof that love is real and it works!
For those who have had the unfortunate experience of a broken relationship or a divorce, there are really two possibilities:
The first is that they didnÂ’'t actually find their soul mate. It was a surface thing that was mistaken for true love. When the storms of life pounded on their love - as it does for every pair of lovebirds, it broke because it wasn't an irreversible bond.
The second is much more unfortunate. Here, the soul mates actually found each other, but because divorce is such an easy option and there is so much flak flying around that once it isn't working then you're not meant or each other and you should quit, they don't spend enough time to exhaust all reconciliatory options and therefore shortchange themselves by taking the supposedly easy way out.
Either situation could have been avoided if you take the following absolutely foolproof steps when the love vibes start knocking on your heart:
First, get to know your basic temperamental leanings. At least you should be able to tell if you are a core introvert or an extrovert. If you would rather watch a movie or read some literature than go out with friends, then you are a core introvert.
Next, think of the kind of person you admire most. Some people say unlike poles attract. I believe and I have seen from years of observation that it's not necessarily so. Sometimes like temperamental poles do attract, sometimes it's the opposite. The best test here is for every individual to have a clear idea of the kind of person that turns them on.
Having a fairly good idea of the kind of person you want before you start falling head-over-heels will serve as a compass to let you know if you should stay down when you do fall or you should get up "heels-over-head" as quickly as you can!
Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, cultivate the habit of making friends widely. I know this might seem rather contradictory to the introverted person, but anything can be achieved if a conscious effort is made. Believe me. It's well worth the try.
When you have a large repertoire of friends with no strings attached initially, it becomes much easier to pass them all through the tests of "turn-on" that we spoke of earlier.
It is no crime to be strongly attracted to several people at the same time. It does happen and it always will. As I said earlier, the love bond, when it has set is indeed a mystery. However, love itself is not some kind of mysterious willowy wispy kind of thing that creeps upon you unawares. If you expect it to be so, you are bound to hurt yourself when you fall head-over-heels in love.
Love is a choice which is reinforced by an initial attraction based on observed potentials. Then comes the commitment which is daily renewed in the hearts of the couple involved and slowly but surely creates an irreversible, unbreakable and indescribably satisfying bond that is well worth all the effort made to create it.
