It's taken a long, long time, but at last you have met the person you want to stick with for life. The One. You will be together forever and nothing will tear you apart. But what if you're wrong?
Shattered dreams are for other couples and although you feel sad for them, in your heart you feel sure that this time you have actually got it right.
Unfortunately new research suggests that even though partners set out with best of intentions, most relationships have a shelf life of only around four years before the rot sets in.
The majority of divorces happen at around the fifth anniversary. These couples don't even get to the seven year itch stage; their relationship is a long time dead by then.
Why four years? Experts suggest that this is the point where all the excitement of setting up house, being hopelessly in love and making plans for the future seems to settle down into a much more settled routine. For many couples this spells boredom rather than the satisfaction of making a life together.
Human beings are by nature victims of a short attention span and they start to wonder at the four year point, is this it?
So, how can you tell if your own relationship is going to fall foul of the four year rule? If you are opposites, are you going to continue to attract, or is this theory simply a recipe for disaster. On the other hand, if you are very similar in likes and dislikes, could this only be leading to a truly mundane existence in the future?
The only real way to check out the staying power of your relationship is to absolutely, totally be sure of your compatibility in the first place, advise psychologists. Try this compatibility test:
Do You Share the Same Social Status?
Statistics suggest people from different backgrounds have to work much harder to stay together.
Do You Have Similar Religious/Ethnic Backgrounds?
Again you're going to have many more family and cultural difficulties to overcome.
Do You Share Hobbies and Interests?
If all your time is spent worrying about money or the kids and no time relaxing together, you're asking for trouble long term.
Are You Matched in Physical Attractiveness?
Could your better-looking partner eventually develop a wandering eye? Will the less attractive partner develop a neediness or dependency?
How Close are You in Age?
Older partners may end up despairing of their young mate's immaturity and vice versa the younger one may become frustrated by their other half's lack of energy.
What's Your Track Record?
If either partner has a history of short, uncommitted relationships, or of infidelity, the likelihood of you surviving is drastically reduced.
