Hi there! Thank you for reading my second installment of my real life experience articles. As you know from my previous article: Online Romance; Fact or Fiction, I will be touching about keeping a long distance relationship alive.
OK. Everyone will tell you that TRUST is the ultimate in any relationships but especially so for long distance ones. But for me, not only does trust come in play but effective communication and a mutual feeling of acceptance. It is very easy to cheat on your loved one when you have a long distance relationship. It's because, "what she/he doesn't know, won't hurt her/him'. But, that is very wrong. If you read my previous article, you know that I cheated on my fiancée. But we moved on from there because he believed in my love for him and that I will atone for my mistakes and make him a happy man.
If your partner cheated on you once, give them a chance to redeem themselves. Sometimes, the temptation is so great and so easy that they fall prey. But don't dismiss your love and future together just by that one mistake. However, if they keep cheating on you with different people, then it's time to let go. It is not worth your time and effort. Trust in your love for them and trust their love for you. Talk to them and find out exactly WHY they are going out with other people. Sometimes the reason is very simple, that you don't spend time with them. I know it's very difficult to keep up with a long distance relationship, but if both of you are committed, some time and activities will have to be sacrificed.
Effective communication is the base to every relationship. There is no such thing as a perfect relationship where you don't argue and fight. All of us are humans and have very different tastes and likes but being able to come to an agreement and accepting your partner's tastes and likes is important. You don't necessarily have to love what they love, but try it out once so that you can have an idea of what it is before jumping into any conclusions. Find out why they like what they like. Put yourself into their shoes and remember if they tell you they are doing that, then most probably they are, and not out with some girl. They will love you for it. When you get into fights, be sure to specifically tell each other what is REALLY bothering you. Ladies, if you want your man to talk to you more and tell you more about his day, then tell him straight.
Being guys, they won't know what it is exactly that you want even though you are soul mates. Take it from me; no one is a mind reader. Guys, do not feel as though your lady is trying to keep track of your every move, she just want to be a part of your life. For me, I wanted to know everything that my fiancée does, it makes me feel as though I was there with him and felt his happiness and sadness. I wanted to be a part of his life. It's not that I didn't have a life of my own, I feel accepted into his life, family and friends when he talk to me about them. However, girls, don't ask for minute to minute detail. That will make him annoyed and think that you do not trust him. With men, you have to let them have their freedom and time but emphasize that you truly care for him, love him, want to be with him and make him happy. In short, give them room to run but pull on the lease to remind him that you are there.
It's hard to fully trust your lover when they are out of your sight. Which is why, I do not recommend FULL trust. And if your partner does the same to you, don't be angry, it just shows that they love you and don't want to lose you. I'm not sure about you but I have image issues. I don't feel that I am beautiful and sometimes wonder why my fiancée wants to marry me. But he always tells me that he find me beautiful, inside and outside. And it's vice versa for him. I am always afraid that other prettier girls would come along and take my fiancée away from me. It's okay to feel like that. Sometimes, a little fear of losing someone makes you work harder to keep your relationship healthy and happy. Because of the fear of losing your partner, he/she should never doubt your love. But please don't be overly worried, if he tells you that he loves you and no one else, trust him but like I said, not FULL trust. This way, if your heart gets broken, the pain won't be so bad.
