After years of intensive study, many relationship successes and failures and seemingly endless conversations about men and women, I think I have finally cracked the women-speak code. The complexities of the female mind are difficult. Women are hard to understand. No, they are nearly impossible to understand. But I think I finally have made some progress! The following are some common every day expressions followed by what a man really means and what a woman really means.
I'm hungry
When a man says this, he means that he would like to eat something.
When a woman says this, she means that she has been working hard all day and needs more attention. She wants to be treated well and shown respect by being escorted to a nice restaurant. She also wants the man to pick the restaurant and somehow pick the exact proper one, even though she doesn't know what type of food she wants.
What will people be wearing?
When a man asks this, he is doing so because he needs to pull his least wrinkled shirt out of the hamper and he needs to know the color.
When a woman asks this, she is thinking that she needs to look her best for the affair, but not too nice because she doesn't want to appear like she spent too much time, or too little time. She needs to not be under-dressed, but also not be over-dressed and she needs to be stylish, but in a genuine, not in a I am trying-too-hard type of way. She wants to look sexy, but not slutty, but slutty-sexy might be ok, depending on how many girlfriends she can call, text, im, and email to get their opinion.
I don't know
Then a man says this; he means that he doesn't know.
When a woman says this she means that she has a strong opinion but she is not going to share it with the man, because the man is not frustrated enough. She needs to confuse you a bit more before she totally has him convinced that she doesn't know, and then she'll flip a 180 and tell the men, exactly what she thinks. She will also generally do this in a louder voice just, as the man is ready to go to sleep.
I forgot.
When I man says this, he means that he forgot.
A woman will actually never say this phrase because they do not ever, ever, forget anything. They will remember every anniversary that you ever had. They will remember your first date, dance, kiss, nice restaurant, parking meter, juggling contest, knife throwing class, and prison rodeo.
Women are really complicated.
