We live in a busy multifaceted world, each of us trying to survive and experience this lifetime in our own way.The truth is that to live a life purely of your own making is extremely difficult. We are constantly having to make decisions which are influenced by others agendas. Whether intentionaly or unconsciously we all do it.
So there lies the crux of the human dilema, how do we live a true life and still live in relationship with others. These are a few thoughts which come to mind.
Firstly know your boundaries. How much of yourself are you are willing to give up and then make this clear to those you are relating too ,then everyone knows the shape and size of the playing field.
Secondly when making decisions. Stop and ask yourself whose agenda you are following and if it is not purely your own then consider whether the decision you are making serves your best interests in the long run.
Thirdly stop and ask yourself if you are imposing your agenda on others in the decision you are making and if so what effect will this have and if possible discuss this with the other party.
I know this all sounds a little difficult as we make decisions all day long and every decision we make in some way effects those we are interacting with. However if we all started to own and see our agenda and be conscious of this in our decision making, then when things turn out differently to what we expected we cannot look to lay blame at anothers feet because we feel we were influenced by them.
Stop for a moment and be still . Think back to the last time something went wrong for you and what your response was. Who did you blame? Now ask yourself if you took the time before making that decision to look at what or who was influencing you and then whether you consciously decided if this was appropriate. If we accept others input then we cannot get upset when things go wrong. We may not all be creating the same future. Thats why honest communication is the most important tool we have as humans.
How many relationships have been destroyed, how many wars have been fought and how many millions have died over hidden agendas.
Then again its nice to be able to blame someone else for the wars that ravage the earth, the destruction of the environment, global warming.etc.etc.etc.
