That guys get nervous when it is a first date is an age-old problem, there is a lot of insecurity around. Young ladies are perhaps more discerning. There are guys who like to come across as if they are in control of what they want to do in life and his date can pick up the insecurity the first time around. That could be a bit of a bummer if he is affected badly by constructive criticism. Some people can be downright insulting and they might best be avoided.
Nervousness comes without knowing what the other person expects. If the other person is not serious about any long-term plans and you are as well, there should be no uneasiness. Feeling distraught would occur if you were expecting something that cannot be obtained. Then you would have to meet a person who has similar goals.
There are so many fish in the ocean why bother fighting over argumentative people. If the girl a guy meets is only going to make him feel more insecure, that may be due to their expectations not being met, but it might also be due to the guy making himself feel insecure. It is senseless to blame someone for your shortcomings especially when you know that the problem is your own making. If you were a drinker and want to drink more, I wouldn't accuse your companion if your humour changes drastically when bottle time hits. I would meet someone who would not mind the fact that you like to drink or smoke and so much the better if she does to.
If the lady has expectations that the man cannot meet, he should recognize it and deal with it. If it is a case of changing appearances, dealing with it has to do with the maturity level you want to reach. If you are the type to move around without a set goal in life and not look for a permanent dwelling, then your appearance is going to be limited. Many women look for stability and as they get older. I found that their questions are more direct about how much you are earning and what you want to do in life. Her security has to do with what she perceives as being stable and if she detects that the man in her life cannot offer any guarantees than that guy is likely to get nervous on occasion.
Sometimes a guy has to just focus on what he wants to do in life and be honest with the person he wants to meet. If she thinks that he has direction, if she is still interested she is more likely to show commitment. Not having focus is what makes a person feel uneasy in company and the outward sign is again nervousness.
