"Well, I believe it was not intended to weigh stuff like persons."
"No, it says it is till 400 pounds, and so I thought, what the heck, see how much I weigh? I WEIGH 75 POUNDS!"
Well, I simply hugged her, and said that it was perhaps just the morning weight, because she looked fine to me.
I did not suspect she would weigh herself about 20 times a day, noting it all in a little red book, so I was kind of surprised when she came to me one night at the couch, did not say a word, and had the greatest intentions in mind. We just made sweet monkey love, and boy she was so squiggly. No more You go In missionary, darling... or questioning my manhood if I didn't. She basically used me as her personal tumbling equipment, and I really could not complain. But the funny sessions of marathon turned into something that basically left me dried out, so I basically just hung up the towel, and decided to investigate.
I fished around in the muddy water for a while, until I found her red book, and in an unguarded moment, looked into it. She was on it with true geekdom, noting how much she weighed, and what she had done. I quickly noted that the biggest weight drops were because of the sex we had all evening, and sometimes in the day. She had even used some basic mathematic skills to solve how she could maximize weight loss, which apparently were the reasons for our marathon romping sessions.
Well, I took matters in my own hands, and hid both weighing device and little red book in my spare server.
She came home, and I was just watching some Cartoons when I brushed my teeth, when she came in the room.
"Hey, have you used my weighing scale, or my little red book?"
"Yup."
"Well, where are they?"
I looked her in the eyes, grinned, and kissed her on the forehead.
"I won't tell."
That night, me and her had the greatest makeup-sex ever.
So, a few days ago, I had been cleaning my spare server, and found both in the frame. So, if you are willing to pay for the postage, and are interested in my former roommates notes on maximizing weight loss, give me a contact address through the comments, and we shall see. As far as I have understood, the secrets are very good, and even I can understand them.
