Secrets of Sexcess

Sex is so much more than what occurs between the sheets. At its best, sex is a mind-blowing, multi-sensory experience that-if you do it right-leaves you deeply relaxed, blissfully exhausted and intimately connected with your lover.

Once you learn the secrets of sexcess, you will enjoy a lifetime of immensely pleasurable sexual experiences beyond your wildest dreams, and you and your lover will be thanking me for years to come.

Planning for Sex

Great sex requires careful planning. What are you going to wear? What sexual activities are you going to engage in? Where will you make love?

Decide in advance what you plan to do and when you plan to do it. Mark the date on your calendar. Write down the time in your appointment book. Decide what you plan to wear?

Are you going out for the evening? If so, you'll want to arrange your boudoir in advance. If you will be staying in, you'll want to plan a menu, set the scene and make any other necessary preparations.

Preparing for Sex

You will need to be relaxed, revitalized and rejuvenated before you embark upon your sexual adventure.

Do some stretches. If you like, do a few yoga poses. Go for a brisk 20 minute walk. Now that you've built up your stamina, you're ready for a little rest and relaxation.

Take a long, warm bath. Pat yourself dry with a luxuriously absorbent towel. Use your dental rinse. Brush and floss your teeth. Gargle with mouthwash. Put on your deodorant. Massage soothing, sensual aromatic oil onto your skin. Dab on a bit of perfume.

Slip into a thick, fluffy bathrobe and comfy slippers. Put on your makeup. Style your hair. Give yourself a manicure and a pedicure. Put on some pretty polish.

Layout your clothing, including the lingerie you'll be wearing (at least briefly) later in the evening. Put special sheets on the bed. Setup lighting, floral arrangements and any props you will need.

Put your birth control and STD prevention equipment within easy reach of your love nest.

Turn on some music. Glance over your menu. Perform whatever food preparation tasks you need to.

When it's time, put on your sexy lingerie. Get dressed. Give yourself a final once over in the mirror.

Now you're ready to greet your lover.

Do Your Research

In order to drive your man to ecstasy, you need to find out exactly what makes his manhood stand up and say “Hello there.” To do this you will have to engage in what will probably be the most fun research project you've ever undertaken in your entire life.

While there a multiple ways to tackle this task, I strongly recommend the direct approach: ask him. Ask him what his sexual fantasies are. Ask him about his previous sexual experiences; you'll want to know what he likes as well as what he doesn't like.

If you are uncomfortable asking him outright, you could try a role-playing game where you play either an executive or a market researcher interviewing him about his sexual experiences, fantasies, preferences and inhibitions (hopefully he won't have too many of these.) You could dress up in a skirt suit, stilettos and crotchless panties. Of course you'll want to cross and uncross your legs multiple times during your, um, interview.

After you've gathered as much firsthand data as you can, you'll need do a little detective work. Check his pockets, his wallet and his papers for indications of his sexual preferences. What you're looking for here is business cards, fliers, invitations, phone numbers, matchbooks…anything that might contain some information about what he finds pleasurable and/or sexy. Carefully analyze the clues you come across. Does he frequent a bar? Has he patronized gentlemen's clubs? Has he visited an adult toy store?

Your due diligence will pay big dividends when your man shows you over again how much he appreciates your taking the time to find out what pleases him.

Creating A Mood

Great sex is all about creating a mood.

The hardest part of creating a mood is deciding what kind of mood you want to create. The possibilities are endless.

You could transform your boudoir into an exotic hideaway by burning incense and draping sheer, sensual fabric around your bed. You could light candles around your bed and bathtub à la “She's Gotta Have It.” You could setup a sexy scavenger hunt that leads to a most delectable treasure: you!

Use the combination of your knowledge of his fantasies, preferences and desires and your own creativity to create a powerfully sensual and seductive mood.

Exciting His Senses

Great sex is a multi-sensory experience. Each and every one of your man's five senses should be stimulated, titillated and tantalized.