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Common Misconceptions

A humorous detailing of five commonly held misconceptions.

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Great Misconceptions Cleared Up At Last!

Modern Man believes that everything he sees is explainable. There are a number of misconceptions held by contemporary man that need clearing up.

1) UFOS

There are no flying saucers. We are alone in the universe. The phenomena commonly referred to as "UFO's" needs to be explained. They are not spaceships from another planet. They are, in actuality, submarines that fly. They contain not an alien race, but men who have evolved after millions of years living under our oceans. With a technology necessitated by their environment, our underwater brothers visit the surface with regularity. To an unthinking observer, the huge eyes and pale gray skin signify an alien race. These are merely men whose evolution has taken a different course.

The lack of light in the bottom of the earths' oceans has turned their sensory organs into huge oblong orbs designed to deliver visual information to their brains under conditions that we Terrans could scarcely imagine. After the continent of Atlantis slid into the ocean, the Atlantean scientists discovered huge underwater caverns. These huge caverns were equipped with natural resources that could keep man alive. Due to their ignorance, they thought that the entire planet was covered with water, so over generations they adapted to life beneath the sea. As their technology advanced, they built submarines which could harvest abundant food from the seas. Many years ago they discovered that man still existed on the face of our planet. Being unsuited to life among us, they come only to mutilate our cattle and confound us with crop circles. They train dolphins to spy on us, and report our movements in the seas to them. Until they are ready to come forward, they will remain elusive.

2) ASSASSINATION CONSPIRACIES

So much misinformation about political assassinations in this country has been deliberately spread, it makes it difficult to sort the chaff from the wheat. This was done to obscure the fact that Hollywood had the true story from the beginning, however fictionalized in "THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE". Teams of scientists were put out of work after failed psy- ops programs were canceled by the Army in the early fifties. Private industry, in league with certain elements of the Department of Defense, hired these psychologists to design a system to create the perfect brainwashed killer.

They started with a small group of soldiers that over the years almost certainly included Lee Harvey Oswald, Mark David Chapman, James Earl Ray. Arthur Bremer, and Sirhan Bashira Sirhan. (Is it a coincidence that the successful assassins have three names and that the unsuccessful ones have only two? I think not.) The major political assassinations have all been managed by the D.O.D., forget the C.I.A. Their assassinations are clumsy by comparison...see the Allende Killing for more proof. There is no way Castro or The Mob could have pulled these off either. Compared to the bumbling C.I.A., these factions are rank amateurs. The F.B.I. did a swell job on Malcom X. That was accomplished by expert manipulation of criminals. No doubt about it, the D.O.D. killings are among the most expertly accomplished politicaly motivated assassinations in recorded history. I feel that the conspirators almost blew it by killing Oswald. In the mind of any thinking person, that action proves that a conspiracy existed.

3) WORLD RELIGIONS

The Worlds' religions are a sham. There is no god, there is only human suffering ameliorated by the pie- in- the- sky- when- you- die rhetoric of the big three religions. While I harbor no hatred in my heart for the followers of the imaginary, I hold a deep sadness for the fact that much of mankind is so incredibly delusional. The very concept of god is simply primitive superstition. Church leaders are certainly aware of these facts. As long as mankind seeks some order from without, god will continue to manipulate the believers any old way he wants to. I don't trust anyone with a purported belief in god...either they are lying or they are delusional. (See Mitt Romney) I would think that instead of catering to religious lunatics, politicians would bend over backwards to disassociate themselves from them. Our founding fathers were, to a man, atheists. They understood that freedom OF religion also means freedom FROM religion.

4) THE WAR ON DRUGS

This "war" is not being waged on drugs, but on common sense. Everyone knows that making drugs illegal does not stop people from taking them. Our society has three choices of drug sellers. We can go back to the pre- 1932 era and have businessmen sell this product; we can charter our government to fill this function; or we can make the worst choice imaginable and put the drug trade in the hands of criminal enterprises. We have inexplicably chosen the third option. The drug criminals are so entrenched, their money guides drug policy. To keep drugs illegal benefits no one but these criminals and those on their payroll. America is so screwed up, a child can buy a crackball faster than he can purchase a cigarette. If these drugs were available in a drugstore to adults with identification, at one tenth of the cost and of assured and consistent purity, not only would we keep drugs out of the hands of children (very stiff penalties would be in place for those who let their drugs fall into the hands of others) we would have the problem identified.

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