Part Two: “When God Speaks Everyone Listens, Even E.F. Hutton”
I'm a firm believer that God talks to everyone who wants to listen to what He has to say. It can be fun and frustrating hearing His voice, and sometimes not hearing Him brings to mind the old saying, “no news is good news”. You can't go wrong with that!
The day before Thanksgiving, I was semi bummed out; no one had invited me for Thanksgiving dinner. I was going to be alone and eating a feast of chili, Cheerios, and Ramen noodles when I could almost smell turkey throughout the neighborhood. This has happened to me before, so I'm used to being left out of things and I don't take it personally. Instead of letting it get to me, I try to remember I am thankful for at least the little bit of food I had – it could've been a truly empty table. It may not be a feast, but looking at a bowl of noodles I knew there were many around the world that would've be thankful to have that blessing.
I'm thinking about how to describe my circumstance, and with a little bit of poetic license, I'd have to say, “the artist formerly known as…” seems to fit it all too well. What was once my life continues to shrink – if that's at all possible. I gave up the idea of driving my car because it was too expensive, so I'm in the process of selling it to a friend for the price of the note. This of course presents problems – like how do you get around without transportation. What partially bothers me isn't so much the getting around, it's the fact the car has 14 payments on it, and it would've been mine outright.
My life has been radically reduced. I have given away so much to charity that my life fits into approximately 25 boxes, and I'm having second thoughts about giving more stuff away so I don't have to carry it to the next place I move. Don't ask me where I'm going – I don't have that kind of an answer, but the house I'm care taking for is on the market, so it's not “if”, it's “when”.
I will admit I drove my car one last time without it having insurance or being registered just to get one last stash of heavy stuff from the grocery store I couldn't carry (giant jugs of water, bottles of laundry detergent) on foot. I will confess I was scared of giving up the vehicle – could I really get along with it, or was it due to Americans' general love of their vehicle? Was I afraid of being viewed as a total loser who couldn't hold onto the basics of life? I can't really say what the answer was, but when I ran out of food, I had no choice but to strap on the backpack and hit the pavement that leads to the store.
I've made the trek several times in November, and I don't know how much distance is between my house and the store. Next time my friend comes down to help me out on something, I'll ask her to drive it and tell me the mileage just out of curiosity. Generally, I try to avoid being a burden to my friends with stuff like this, but to carry a 2.5 gallon jug of water in a backpack isn't a practical solution.
After the first hike to the store, I felt a pain in the arch of my left foot, and I hobbled around on it for the next few days. I simply chalked it up to being from exercise I'm not used to engaging in. I'll admit it – I'm very out of shape and find myself breathing heavy after I've crawled into bed. Now if I were the kind of person who could do phone sex for pay, I'd make a lot of money with all that huffing and puffing! Pain may be a motivator, but hunger is an even bigger one, so when the food ran low, I strapped on the backpack and hit the pavement.
I knew I had to get my butt in gear the day before Thanksgiving just in case the grocery store closed early. I didn't have much in my pocket for cash, but I had enough to get a couple cans of tuna, more Ramen noodles, tomato soup, and a fresh box of Cheerios. I pushed back from the computer desk, and started to think. “I need a shower. I'm hungry. I'm thirsty. I have to pee. Join the Peace Corps.”
I stopped dead in my tracks. What just came out of my brain?! I instantly remembered an old Sesame Street song I used to sing as a joke when something wasn't right. “One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just isn't the same…” I could understand shower, hunger, thirst, and need to relieve myself, but the Peace Corps?! I wasn't thinking about joining anything except a bar of soap to my stinky body and spoon to my lips.
The shower called to me, so I jumped in and jumped out. I didn't know how long the stores would be open, but it was already past 3:00 PM and if I didn't move it, I would be going a bit hungry. Throwing myself together so as not to scare little children or cause cars to go off the road, I ventured outside to the store. There was only one thing on my mind: did I really hear what I thought I heard? Was this God's voice, or another spirit trying to trick me into screwing up my life further? Answers are great, but they often do not come around according to your time frame.
quazen.com articles by this writer can be found here
socyberty.com articles can be located here
relijournal.com articles are here
picable.com photographic images are here
