I believe the ability to listen is becoming a dying art. Think about the last conversation you had with a co-worker or neighbor; how quickly did what you were trying to say become about them? Last week I had a problem at work, I was called into my supervisor's office for a performance review, of course my cubicle neighbor asked, “How'd it go?” Well, before I got two sentences out of my mouth I notice we were talking about the trouble her three-year-old had given her the night before. I realize people like to talk about themselves, but don't ask me a question if you're not going to give me the courtesy of listening to the answer.
Has our electronic society become so disconnected that having a one-on-one conversation is hard, if not impossible for most people? Or in this country of instant gratification have people become so self-absorbed that they don't really care about each other? I would like to think, no. People do care about each other; we just don't know how to listen to each other any more.
Now, I'm not an expert, I don't have a degree in human communication, but I am a human and I want to say, “If you ask someone a question, listen to the answer!” Focus on the person you're talking to, actually hear what they are saying. Don't think about what you're going to say next, no, hear what the person you are talking to says.
OK, OK, you say, “I listen, I do!” But do you really? Think about it. Think about the last conversation you had. Did you actually learn anything personal about the person you were talking to or did you just talk about the TV show you both watched last week? I suspect the latter. We need to really listen. Next time you have the opportunity to talk to someone you should feel fortunate and take the time to really hear what they say. You'd be surprised at the interesting thing you can find out about people, just by shutting up and hearing what the other person says.
