Prayer is like visiting with your closest friend, your creator, your daddy, abba - God. Of course there is awesome power and dynamic energy in this place. Of course there is a sense of "fear". And we are to fear God, but not in that running away and hiding sense. In the sense of recognizing as we are able, just who God is.
Initially, coming behind the veil is a bit scary. I mean God is God, right! And you can remember all those things that happened to those who went before God and were "toast" right? Or swallowed up by a huge crack in the ground. Um hm. Well, we have a new a living way, and if you "know" Jesus, really and personally know Him, then there will be peace flooding your heart and joy unspeakable.
I would suggest you read the Psalms (David's) and see how he sought the Lord in all of his ways, and trusted in the Lord for his very life. A key to what we need to be about.
The veil was closed for a season, and when it was time, it was cleaved in two and access was open for all who choose new life to enter in. Otherwise you will stay out on the outskirts, in the outer court or maybe the inner one. But coming boldly into the Holy of Holies, the throne room of God. In case you haven't caught onto it yet, I know about this because for many years, even after my return to God, I stood in the outer court wanting to go inside the veil, but feeling unworthy. Or even worse, I judged myself as not good enough to go in. Like God's sacrifice wasn't enough; but I didn't see it like that for a season.
It's funny how life's situations and such conform us to rigid, self-judged, ugly icons, which we worship with our distaste and despair, as well as our hatred. Yes I said worship, as in what we empower and hold up as truth. Caught up in the trap of unforgiveness. If this is you, I recommend you continue reading, the next chapter is on the FORGIVENESS FACTOR. As you get free from unforgiveness, bitterness and resentment, you will be ready to learn and grow in the prayer-life.
The Forgiveness Factor
In life we grow through many stages - baby, toddler, child, youngster (pre-teen), teen, young adult, adult. We also learn how to relate, how to live with others and how to communicate, listen, appreciate, discern, love; and on the negative side, rebel, hurt, speak evil of, judge, accuse, blame, hate.
Many of us have baggage that we have been carrying for most if not all of our lives. While we don't acknowledge much of it, until a problem arises, baggage still affects our lives, and in many instances, determines how well or how little we will live our lives. Most of this baggage is in our sub-conscious thoughts, feelings, visions/images/pictures/vain imaginations. Got it?
One of the most devastating pieces of baggage is "unforgiveness". It adds bitterness, resentment, arrogance, meanness, spitefulness, "victimness" [my word, meaning one's acceptance of their life as a victim], and hatred. Unforgiveness roots deep and has many sprouts of a bondaged, captive human nature.
Wars, shootings, most acts of unbelievable (but now acceptable as part of our society) violence - these are all results of deep-seeded unforgiveness.
Taken out of context, the term discipline can be used to cover up brutal, physical harm and it was for this reason that "violence" became a focus in family issues. Imbalance of any kind brings about confusion and irrationality, and in a society that has grown to respect its ability to fairly deal with all issues, imbalance became an accepted "way" of dealing with issues that required balance, at least.
With a desire to stop unnecessary violence, physical discipline (and emotional) has been forced out of homes. Rather than curbing violence, this "new way" has paved a way for violence to grow under all kind of banners, the least of which is pleasure. Gangs rule, violence is becoming a way for younger and younger people to behave - in other words, we have enslaved our future generations to self-centered meanness and desires. And isn't it funny that when physical discipline was removed, violence grew? Go figure.
Talk about imbalance. (And to think that unforgiveness paved the way). Look closely at the decisions made regarding home life, the bringing up of children, and you will find unforgiveness, judgment, blame, and attempts at shifting guilt from one's own conscience to the plate of people caught in the "new way" of growing children up.
At any rate, it is hard to forgive. In fact, without focus and determination, one will turn away from it, in our society. There are societies where forgiveness is taught as a way of life, and it does reduce violence, and develop character.
