How many of us have woken up with a distinct feeling of dread about going to work? Have you sat outside your place of work in the car coaxing yourself to go in?
Deep down we’ve probably all been there to a greater or lesser degree, if some people that read this are not in the situation right now.
At times I myself have been so unhappy in a job that I have jumped at the chance to run an errand, or feigned a kidney infection just so that I could make extra trips to the bathroom. And all this just to get away from irritating colleagues who we have to get on with 8 hours per day, 5 days a week.
Why do we put ourselves through this?
Very few of us are lucky enough to have an approachable employer. Having said that, I have an employer who always has time to listen, and first and foremost does not judge me unfairly.
I am not suggesting that to enjoy one’s job, it is essential to have a good relationship with you boss, but it certainly does help.
Life wouldn’t be the same if we got on with everyone, and all lived happily ever after. Surely we all enjoy a good discussion about an irritating colleague behind their back? It’s deemed to be healthy in fact. For all the back biting we do, there will always be someone doing it to you, that’s my theory anyway.
I never entirely understand why people stay in a job role that they utterly despise. I can empathise with the annoying colleague rut, but that’s just something as humans we have to cope with, and in general we do well.
If it’s a case of boredom within the job, then it is up to you to revise your plans and aspirations within the company. If you went into your job with high hopes, then why not continue to uphold them?
So what can you do about it?
Many people are given the opportunity to discuss performance and progression within their roles, by means of ‘peer’ or ‘performance’ reviews. These usually take place annually, and give both you, and your employer the opportunity to discuss your place within the company. This can be used very much to your advantage, so make sure you use this platform ton have your say.
Many people make these meetings more ‘informal’ as people feel more confident to speak their minds if they know they are not being formally judged.
If you do not currently have access to such a review process, then it is your right to request this. Approach your employer with a watertight explanation as to why you would like a review, you never know, you could be doing colleagues a huge favour too.
Why is it employers and managers are so free to offer criticism and negative comments about us or our performance at work?
Can you even remember the last time you received a comment of praise, or an actual ‘pat on the back’?
Having worked in senior roles myself over the years, I have firmly taken hold of this theory, and do believe that praise and thanks is a good way of increasing productivity and raising employee morale.
It has been proven that when thanking an employee for a ‘good job done’, a gentle hand on their shoulder at the time you are talking heightens the genuineness of your words. A very valid point I think.
To stay or go?
If your reasons for being unhappy in your role are because of the actions or behaviour of a particular person, it is your responsibility to take this to task, and have an open and honest discussion with them. The direct approach often gets far quicker results. There may turn out to be a simple explanation for the relationship breakdown, that could easily be remedied.
Often issues escalate from something relatively trivial, such as borrowing someone’s cup in the staff room, or accidentally not passing on a phone message. These things are often not meant to be malicious, and once discussed with the person concerned, can successfully clear the air.
If you are unhappy with your role and responsibilities in general, this can only be dealt with by having an honest and open discussion with your manager. They may have noticed your flagging enthusiasm, and give exciting projects to colleagues, simply because they assume you are no longer interested in the job. As you can see, a frank discussion can salvage a potentially catastrophic situation.
If you don’t speak up, then you will simply drown in the negativity of the thing you spend such a large part of your life doing.
Most of all, if you have attempted every possible way of making your job feel more appealing, or your colleagues more tolerable, and you still detest the very thought of it, then my advice is to focus on finding a job that provides you with a fresh start, and a new challenge.
Yes, the very thought of feeling disloyal to your boss when you first start out on the job hunting trail, can often be nauseating, but think of the jubilation you later feel on the day you leave a job that has grated against you for such a long time.
My advice
It’s simple really, if you find yourself constantly whinging about your job, become snappy at home because the stress is getting to you, or you feel you are going nowhere in the company, then only you can do something about it.
Don’t sit back and waste the best earning years of your life.
Have a broader view of life, and most of all believe in yourself.
