Let me start by saying I was raised with religion in/out of our lives.  When it was in, it was in and it was completely overboard - super strict, devout, dedicating every waking moment to the word of God.  When it was out - it was out completely.  No middle ground.  As an adult I ponder about God, Religion, and many other things, but that is a whole different article.  With that said, What exactly is life all about?

Stages of life:  Birth, Childhood, Adult, Death.  So life is a cycle, we all know that.  Sometimes things may overlap.  A child might have to take on adult responsibilities and skip out on a childhood.  An adult might get alzheimer's or some other disease that makes them revert back to a child like dependent state.  Life is made up of all these decisions we get to make in these various stages.  There's not much we can do about the parents we have.  We learn at a very young age how to correspond and interact, what is acceptable and what isn't, what we should do and shouldn't and what we could do and couldn't.  Most of life seems to fall around finances. Whether it's money for some new school clothes, a toy, or car, to where we will live, pay rent or mortgage, go to college or work, or both.

It seems to define one's life worth it falls into two categories:  Wealth and Good/Bad.  Everyone wants to make as much money as possible by doing as little as possible.  The more free money the better.  The more time we have to have fun the better.  Every one of us wants to think we are a good person, making good choices.

Some of us are lucky enough to have a job we love, some have a job we find things in we love, although it's not our first, or maybe not even our second choice - but we find things to enjoy, while others just hate their job.  So, is it the job or the money that defines the individual?  If you were paid $30k more per year to do your current job you hate, would you suddenly like your job?  If you had to do something you think is horrible, or dislike immensly, but you would get the salary you want, do you think you would be happier?  These are all questions I wonder.  I say I love my job.  And I sorta do.  It pays what I like - but there's always room for improvement there, you know? lol.  It has some perks to it.  Some days I feel very smart when I do my job.  Somtimes my job is very rewarding.  Other times it's very very stressfull and boring.  In order to keep my sanity everyday, I just focus on what I love.  I also think of where I could be - unemployed, making minimum wage, struggling every day just for the basics.  I've been there before, it's No Fun. My job doesn't define me as a person, but gives me the resources to define myself.  I am able to help others less fortunate, be a good mom, provide the necessities for my family.  It also allows me to do some of the things I enjoy.  Ok, so life isn't all about money, but we need money in order to get through life, and even enjoy it...

So then we look at the good/bad side of things.  Are we a good person?  If so, in who's eyes?  Most people will respond we need to be good in God's eyes.  Ok, so there's a starting point, as long as we exclude all those religions that believe that killing people and/or suicide, is God's word.  The basic beliefs - thall shall not kill, love thy neighbor, obey thy parents, etc.  So, you don't break any laws, rules, and you live a nice quiet life.  Is that what is good?  Or is good when you go above and beyond and help others less fortunate, help strangers cross a road, smile at people, wave, and just give that warm fuzzy feeling to others?  And how bad are we when we go slightly over the speed limit, tell a lie, or eat that grape at the grocery store? Or are we only bad when we cross over those limits or get caught?  Is there a level of badness that is acceptable?  Or is bad gone when we apologize or repent? 

Ok, so what is life all about?  What do I want said when I die?  How do I want to be remembered?  What do I want to do before I die?  I'm still trying to figure that all out.  For now, I'll go to work and smile that I have a job, smile that it pays me decently which pays my bills.  I'll smile that I have a few people in this world that love me and consider me their friend, and smile that I have found a few people out there I consider trustworthy enough to call my friend.  I'll smile that I'm able to show my daughter love, hard work and dedication that maybe someday she can look back and say she had a pretty good childhood.  I'll smile every time someone takes a piece of candy out of my candy dish.  I'll smile knowing that I like who I am, I can look in the mirror and see someone that cares about others and themself.  I think life is getting through those rough patches so we can really enjoy the good things about life. 

A better brighter chapter, free of hurt, of sorrow, of want, of need. Death is not the end of life but the transformation of it. And though absent from those we love and those who love us, take comfort in knowing our spirits are with God. The confines, shackles, and bonds of this world have no more hold. We are united with him who loves us more than anyone. So when our earthly vessels fail and the paths we've treaded have made us weary, we close our eyes to rest.

And though our bodies may never rise again to roam this earth, our spirits will live on. They will live in the memories of those we impacted, those we reached, those we touched, those we changed. Our spirits live in our spouses, our children, our family, our friends. We are remembered by the love we shared with others. This is not the end, and though her body has left us, her spirit will remain with us forever.

I remember when I was a little girl I felt some one tuck my covers around me and trust me I was very scared. No one else was in my home accept my mother who was in the shower. Not even Five minutes later the phone rang and she came out of the bathroom to answer it; and after she hung up she came and told me my grandfather had just passed away. I myself have had many experiences with those from beyond the grave and I will admit I was very afraid at first. Then my mother told me one day that those who have passed on are trying to make contact with us is letting us know they are all right. She also said that some don't even know they are dead yet and they are just reliving life over and over again.

I was taught to reach out and find out what is that they want or what is it they are trying to tell me. Sometimes relatives come back to either give us warnings or show us they are still there every step of the way with us. The Native American Shamans believed in the great spirits of the earth and respected what God gave to man. Yet, man has torn down some holy grounds to build houses, parks, business, and much more. This can easily wake the dead up just think if that was your grave wouldn't you want to know who is living on top of you?

I respect much paranormal society's for going out to explain the unexplained! One of my favorite shows on T.V. is "Ghost Hunters" it's because they go out opening minded to find explanations for those who report a haunting that has or is taking place. They explain about the equipment they use and how they use it to report any activity that is or isn't in a place claimed to be haunted. I love watching the show for the simple fact that it reminds me of what my mother taught me about positive and negative energy that surrounds us all in life and in death. This energy is what keeps a soul going long after they have passed on to and as some of us were taught the after life. This is why appliances will act weird, or lights will cut off or on, and why objects move on their own.

She also taught me we each have a special gift inside of us we are not aware of and some of us are. I believe that some physics are real well others are out there just trying to make a fast buck. Our dreams can also be an entry way to the spirit world for when we are asleep our bodies are resting while our souls are searching. When we die we can't take these bodies with us so; that just leaves our souls. I remember when my other grandfather was about to pass away I went to visit him in the hospital. He was a stubborn man who did not express his feelings openly but, he was a great grandfather to have. I was standing in the doorway to his hospital room and he was lying on the bed and looked to be asleep.

So silently I stood there and looked at him for a few moments. My grandfather was legally blind without his glasses and they at that time were off his face while he was resting. With his eyes still closed he called out my name "Barbara Jean" and told me to come over by him. He told to take my grandmother home for he wanted to die with out her there he could not stand to see her cry in grief. Then he told me how much he loved me and he will always be there when he knew I needed him the most. He died that night and he kept his word he is always there when I needed him the most. I can smell his cigars he loved to smoke when he was alive all around me when he visits and many others have too.

There are many ways the spirits in the after life will make contact with us some know and some may even be unknown to us. One thing is for sure the spirits walk around us everyday for life and death is just one complete life. Remember this is that we have more time than we do life so; make the best of here and now while you are still here and if you here a bump in the night don't be afraid its a soul from beyond just trying to let you know they are there or it could just be your cat....

This story for me as changed my perception of the after life and what might be in store for me, I have always been on the safe side just in case in my opinion its better to be safe then sorry, I abide to the bible in away I don’t read the bible but I know the so called 10 commandments, I don’t want to be on the wrong side of god when I die.

This story as only come to light to me and still to this day haunts me in a way, I find it hard to believe, the truth is this story is real and will have an effect on your beliefs even maybe change you the way you think right now.

The story begins in the year 1995, it involves my little brother maybe a back story on my little brother would be helpful, when he was born he was born with a dodgy wind pipe, at the back of his throat the flap (I’m not a doctor and have no idea what its called) that separates your lungs from your throat pipe didn’t work and kept blocking his lungs causing him to die, this happened four times before the doctors managed to sort him out.

In 1995 my little brother was with my mum in the living room when she asked him how many brothers and sisters he had, my brother replied 4 (there is not there is me and my sis), my mum looked puzzled and said no you have two. He the replied to my mother no I have four, Neil and Rachel and then my older brother and sister, my mum was once again puzzled and told him he must be wrong as I am the oldest. My little brother wasn’t having any of it and he told her that when he was younger and he died so many times his older brother and sister was there when he died they told him not to worry and he will soon be better.

I remember this story so well as I was in the room at the time, the problem was back then I did not believe my younger brother as I knew I was the oldest, or so I thought. Then a few months back something new came to light I was looking through the attic and found a card saying congratulations on the twins, I first thought it was something left in the attic by the people who used to own the house, I asked my mum about it and she finally told me that before me she was carrying twins when she had a miscarriage and lost them both, a few days later the story about my brother and his older brother ands sister clicked I asked my mum about the twins she told me one was a boy and one was a girl, I then asked about my little brothers story and she told me he could have been right.

This to me as really made me think abut the after life maybe there is some place we go, its hard to imagine but from now on I will make sure that I do no harm if there is a after life I sure as hell don’t want to go to hell.